Last week, I spoke on the power of positive self talk. Please check it out beautiful ladies if you missed it. In the same light, our children are also deserving of positive affirmations. Think about how happy you feel when you get complimented. Compliments are a little gift of love. They teach us that we are worthy of praise and worthy of being noticed. However, compliments only work when they are coming from a sincere place.
Similar to how you feel when complimented, positive affirmations are just as important to the mental and emotional well being of children. As parents, this is one of the practices my husband and I do for our son. My husband does it while he and our son are having play time. While me on the other hand, make sure that our son and I do this practice in the mornings.
In the mornings, my son and I stand in front of a mirror. With his hands on his chest, some of the words that I speak to him are “I am proud of you, I love you, you are enough, thank you for choosing me as your mom, you are a shinning star, you are great, you are wonderfully and fearfully made, you will be a great husband and father, you are a leader, you can do all things through christ that strengthens you e.t.c.”
On the other hand, some of my husbands words to our son are ” I love you, you make me so happy, you will excel, you can do it and I believe in you, don’t give up in trying because practice makes you perfect, you are wealthy, I knew you could do it.”
Every time that we do this, he puts on a bright big smile and of course it makes us happy as well because we know that though he might not understand, it helps build his self confidence, and nurtures his authentic self.
Importance of Positive Affirmation
I took to instagram a few weeks ago and shared a story of my experience with micro aggression while I was young. Growing up in Nigeria, I actively had to think about the color of my skin being a threat to my livelihood. I was told that I was too light skinned and that I was very likely to get married to an Albino. This is absolutely nothing against Albinism but, those micro aggressions influenced the way that I showed up to the world as a little child and it was something that I didn’t take for granted. I can’t fully remember if I expressed my concerns to my parents but I wish my parents had known what I know now. Sharing this story brings me to my point on confidence boosting.
As a parent, you should be your children’s inner dialogue because children look up to us in so many ways. I understand that being a parent is not an easy job as we all know raising kids do not come with a manual. But, we have to make sure that our words to them are what I call an edged sword of light because these words are the prime source to their level of confidence.
Every parent want his or her child to be bold, and confident in him or herself but have we thought about what contributing factors are tied to self confidence in children?. You might have a child who is an extrovert, maybe because that was a trait he or she inherited from one or both parents. But children who are extroverts are not exempted from lack of self confidence, lack of self awareness, and a continual sense of self critic. This is why the role of a parent goes beyond being a provider, and signing your kids up for basketball practices.
The words that we project towards our children contributes to their growth mindset. It is the foundation to how they show up in the world, how far they climb, what friends they keep, what careers they pursue, what life path they choose to embark on, their relationship with adults and their peers.
Like I said, your words are like two edged swords. A parent, who is fond of talking down on his or her kid should not expect a kid who excels academically. If you are a parent, and you are constantly comparing your child’s achievements and development to his siblings, his peers, and other children around him. You are doing yourself and that child a very huge disservice because not only do you dim this child’s light, you as a parent eventually would feel ashamed to show off this child to the world. Please note that it is never too late to start practicing positive affirmation in your children’s life no matter their age.
I personally consider positive affirmation as a form of prayer. If you have been following my blog posts, you’d notice that I do not leave out mentioning prayer. Oh yes! I takes my faith very seriously.
So, parents reading this or aspiring parents, please note that instilling positive affirmations in your children everyday is a ‘MUST and not a CHOICE.’
Lastly, children are great imitators. As you project positive affirmations to them, teach them to do it for themselves too. Deuteronony 11:19 “Teach them to your children. Talk about them when you are at home and when you are on the road, when you are going to bed and when you get up.”
Some examples of Positive Affirmations.
You are important,
Practice makes you better,
You are wonderfully and fearfully made,
You are a shinny star,
I love you,
I see you are trying so hard! great job,
I will always be here for you,
Lean on me, when you are not strong, 🙂
You don’t have to go through anything alone,
You make every thing better,
With you, my life has a whole new meaning,
You are my answered prayers. ( And you can add to the list)
Above, is a free link to a cool and free coloring book of positive affirmations for your children. Please be sure to follow my blogging instagram page @Momrapport. Here is the link https://www.instagram.com/momrapport/
As always, see you beauties on my next blog post. Be sure to share, like, comment, and leave suggestions on topics you’d be interested in. Remember to stay kind, and gentle to yourself.
See you soon !!! 🙂